Sunday, January 20, 2008
The Game
While surfing the Internet this week, I came across this blog, apparently from a female college student, about sex. There's some good stuff in it, including a couple of very funny stories about her first time and giving her first b.j. She's quite frank, as women of her generation can be, which is great. We've come along way in even 10-20 years.
One thing I read wasn't really a revelation, per se, but was a great distillation of "The Game" we all play in dating and mating. I don't think I've ever seen it boiled down so well. She was commenting on Vh1's "The Pickup Artist" in this post and the advice he gives to the game's hard-luck guys:
"Guys, I swear to you, it really isn’t that hard. Find a realistic target, show interest, be polite and hold back. Stop chasing those unattainable girls who will only break your heart. Don’t shower her with gifts and phone calls and plans for the future. Throw out some bait, and wait for her to come to you. There is a girl out there waiting for a guy like you to get into her panties, but if you’re wearing a Speedo and rolling around with Lance Bass, you’re not going to get any.
You don’t need books and TV and some hack who clearly stalks Tommy Lee. Just some confidence will do."
Excellent, all the way through. I spent a lot of time when I was younger pining over women who saw me as their friend -- mostly because I befriended them, rather than playing the game the way it's been shown through time to work. It's somewhat sad that you can't go out with someone, tell them you're interested in seeing where it goes, call when you get home or the next day to say that you had a nice time and go from there. Instead, we're wondering, though we're dying to talk to them again, if we should call or not ... how soon is too soon and how long is too long?
I suppose there's some necessity to this. It can be easy to smother, to overwhelm, to just go faster than the other person is ready for. One is talking future marriage when the other just wants to get know you and see if this is a relationship worth exploring for a while. So we start dating's dance, trying not to trip on our own feet.
It's the way it is and it ever shall be.
One thing I read wasn't really a revelation, per se, but was a great distillation of "The Game" we all play in dating and mating. I don't think I've ever seen it boiled down so well. She was commenting on Vh1's "The Pickup Artist" in this post and the advice he gives to the game's hard-luck guys:
"Guys, I swear to you, it really isn’t that hard. Find a realistic target, show interest, be polite and hold back. Stop chasing those unattainable girls who will only break your heart. Don’t shower her with gifts and phone calls and plans for the future. Throw out some bait, and wait for her to come to you. There is a girl out there waiting for a guy like you to get into her panties, but if you’re wearing a Speedo and rolling around with Lance Bass, you’re not going to get any.
You don’t need books and TV and some hack who clearly stalks Tommy Lee. Just some confidence will do."
Excellent, all the way through. I spent a lot of time when I was younger pining over women who saw me as their friend -- mostly because I befriended them, rather than playing the game the way it's been shown through time to work. It's somewhat sad that you can't go out with someone, tell them you're interested in seeing where it goes, call when you get home or the next day to say that you had a nice time and go from there. Instead, we're wondering, though we're dying to talk to them again, if we should call or not ... how soon is too soon and how long is too long?
I suppose there's some necessity to this. It can be easy to smother, to overwhelm, to just go faster than the other person is ready for. One is talking future marriage when the other just wants to get know you and see if this is a relationship worth exploring for a while. So we start dating's dance, trying not to trip on our own feet.
It's the way it is and it ever shall be.
# posted by Frankly Speaking @ 7:46 AM 
